The Empty Nest

September 15, 2013 was the official date that we became empty nesters.  I expected to be in the bed with severe depression for at least a couple of weeks and to need some pretty in-depth therapy for at least six months.  After all, being a stay-at-home mom to my five children was my life's calling for the last 26 years.  One day, out of the blue, you have no more children at home.  Just like that, my career of being a stay-at-home mom ended.  Kitty left for her YWAM program in New York and something strange happened....

 

 I started sleeping late.  I started giving all of my attention to my husband. I bought some dance lessons on Groupon.  I began to do some things that I wanted to do.  I reconnected with several old friends. I started noticing hundreds of things to be thankful for and counting my blessings.  As the days passed, I realized that I was more content and peaceful than I had expected to be.  Want to know why? Because the expression "empty nest" is not a term that is applicable to people whose hearts are full and my heart is full!  I have five children who love the Lord and who love me. There is no greater joy on the face of the earth than to know that your children are walking with the Lord.  I am not empty.  I am full of joy and peace and my heart is at rest. I would go so far as to say that I am rich. Rich in the things with eternal consequences.  The condition of my heart is not dependent on how many children I have under my roof.  How silly was I to buy into that?! I was sad most of last year because I was dreading the dreaded "empty nest."  I know God and I should have known better.

In Ecclesiastes, King Solomon writes about the futility of life.  He asks a lot of questions and repeats himself  a lot but in the end he makes it clear that the "things" of life are meaningless.  He encourages us to look for joy in the companionship of our mates, a cheerful disposition and a reverence for God.  Amen King Solomon, good preaching.

Eccl. 3:1 says: "There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven."This verse has given me so much comfort and hope in the different seasons in my life. The footnote in my Disciples Study Bible says:

        God has constructed His world so that different events come and go on schedule. The world God created has a well-balanced structure.  He holds everything together in His wise and omnipotent hand.

It is such a relief to know that my times are in God's hands.  God is good. He is faithful and I can trust Him. The book of Ecclesiastes does not offer the final light to a worthwhile life, but it does lead us to praise Jesus Christ all the more for bringing the final Light that gives supreme worth to life.  Both here on earth and in eternity.

So I'm good. Really good.  But if you are in a season of life that is very difficult for you and you are not good, I have some suggestions that I pray will help you:

1) Be gentle with yourself.  Sleep late.  Take a nap.  Put away your to-do list. Delegate responsibilities. Learn to say "no."

2) Breathe deeply.  Go ahead take about seven really deep, slow breaths.  It is good for you.

3) Take care of yourself.  Eat well and exercise. Drink lots of pure water.  Really simple to do.

4) Find a happy place to visit...your little heaven on earth.  Mine is Collier's Nursery here in Birmingham.  Go to your place and drink it all in.

5) Try something new.  I bought some French CD's so that I can be fluent when Rusty takes me to Paris someday!  What have you always wanted to do? Run a marathon? Paint like the masters? Learn to sew or knit? Go back to school? Grow a rose garden?The sky is the limit.

6) Dream and plan for the future.  Don't lose hope.

7) Surround yourself with positive life-giving friends who love you and who will pray for you and speak truth to you.

8) Give thanks.  This simple practice can change your life. Have you read Ann Voskamp's book One Thousand Gifts? Visit her blog at www.aholyexperience.com

9) Help someone else. Find a way each day to do something for someone else.  Something as simple as smiling holding the door for a stranger can make their day.

10) Count your blessings.

Calm My Anxious Heart: A Woman's Guide to Contentment by Linda Dillow has had a very positive impact on me and all of my family and friends who have read it.  It is a great companion book for a difficult season.

Be at rest dear friends.  God has you in the palm of His hand.

I hope to share more frequently as the Lord leads me.  I welcome your comments and suggestions for future topics.

Blessings to you and yours,
JoAnne

"This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24